The Wise Hobo

"We're nothing in this universe except for the energy we put out there. Most of us need to stop living in this imaginary box of what we think we're supposed to be doing because it's all just a misconception. There is no box, we're all just energy. So be the wind and find your adventure, that way you can say 'I've done it and it's great' rather than wonder about it as you skip rocks in to the ocean. The meaning of life is evident if you can see with your heart."

I thought that she was on drugs the first time we met (and part of me still thinks she was), but I think all the same we were destined to cross paths.

It was a frigid night in the last port north and the cool Canadian air held my breath hostage everytime I exhaled, suspending it like a Cirque du Soleil winter performance. I was walking my young pup at the waterfront along the CN dirt road where there were lights, important lights. Lights that would prevent the dark 5 pm sky from enveloping me in danger and rendering me mostly invisible to the rare highschool drivers speeding down this deserted road. I was frustrated that night to have to fulfill the responsibilities of a good dog owner because all I wanted to do was curl up on my couch beside my Toronto lamp and relive the Beat generation alongside Sal and Dean. They just arrived in Denver after all and I wanted to know what mischief they would surely find themselves in. But, unfortunately, my curiousity had to wait because at that moment I was busy risking frostbite. At least my pup had a good time.

So there I was alone with my dog running off leash sniffing things that I didn't want to know about when in the distance, I could see a shadow of a person appear with a dog about the same size as mine. I was walking in the direction of the shadow and as with every other dog walker I pass by, I slowed down to assess whether they were the "stop and let our dogs play" type or the "nod and quickly walk away" type. As I closed the gap between myself and the shadow I could see that it was a woman roughly 5'5" in height looking worse for wear as if she had been walking all day without stopping. With her she had a shaggy dog, mostly black with patches of white on it's face and belly and evidently much older than mine. As we approached one another, I slowed down and told my dog to heel and she, well she called out to me.

"Hey you...yeah you...is your dog friendly?"

"Um, yes, yes, my dog is very friendly, how about yours?"

"I don't know, I'm just dog sitting him while his owners are away. Not too sure if he's the aggressive type, but I haven't had problems yet."

I let my dog smell the other dog and then off they went playfully wrestling each other into the snow. She introduced herself, but for the life of me I can't remember her name. I don’t really think I was meant to. I asked her if she was new in town and she told me she sort of was. She told me she was only in town dogsitting and babysitting for people she knew and when I asked her where she was from, she answered me with "no where in particular, but anywhere I stop is home". I contemplated this response and she explained. She expained that she hasn't had a traditional "home" in years and travelled to different cities in North America where she could find work. She had just left Arizona because some friends of hers in town asked her for help promising her a house for a couple of months and payment for her services. She told me that she left her motorcycle in Arizona.

Instantly I was drawn to her. After all I was in the middle of reading Kerouac's On The Road and her life seemed to be a chapter straight from it. The only things missing were the poetic chaos, the drugs and the free sex. Although, like I mentioned before, I'm still unsure of whether or not she was on something when we made our first passing and if she was then the drugs could be crossed off the list.

"Is it hard? To not have a home? Or to jump around from place to place looking for work?" I blurted, realizing that I may have been a little too frank with my curiousity and sounding a tad judgemental (this was never my intent). I guess she was able to perceive the meaning of my poorly worded question and gave me a small chuckle.

"You know," she said, pausing as she thought of how she would string her sentence together, "I have never been more happy in my life. In fact, I was married once. I have a son that's in a band down south and he might make it big one day. I had a job too, you know, my nine to five. But after my divorce I said to hell with it. I gave up the things that confined me so I could taste the truest form of freedom and I don't regret a single choice I've made. You're young, you probably feel that there's a path you have to follow. The path of going to work, making your money, buying what you think you need and getting promoted so you can have more money to buy more of the things that you think you need. But really, that whole cycle is just an illusion that's been forced into our minds by society. It's necessary because without people being trapped in this cycle society couldn't exist, could it? But we're not bees, and I don't think we're meant to be. There isn't a queen we protect and we all have a choice whether to be a worker or not. Too bad most people don't see it that way."

"Freedom eh? Must be nice...wish I had the balls to do what you did," I lamented, being even more intrigued. Not only did I stumble upon a hippy type hobo, but a hippy type hobo with a philosophy on life.

"So what's keeping you? If I were your age I would've bolted for an adventure as soon as I thought of one," she asked me.

"Work. I work to pay my bills because If I don’t then I'll be in trouble," strangely I felt like she was the type of stranger that would be perfect to vent to.

"But that's not how life works. Whatever you give the universe is what you get back. If you exude an energy that says you're trapped then guess what you'll be trapped! If you take a leap of faith and exude a different energy, that's what you'll get back from the universe. You say you work to pay bills...you may not intend to but your energy is telling the universe that you want to work to pay your bills. So guess what the universe is giving back to you? More bills to pay and more work so you can pay those bills. Get what I mean? I’ll tell you this, I’ve never had more money in my life until I walked away from worrying about it. I could probably buy two houses here right now, but do I want to? No, not really."

"Maybe that’s just you. I don’t know if I quite agree with what you say," I said. She was silent for a while and as she collected her words I picked up a stone and tossed it into the ocean.

"You don't have to agree with what I tell you but remember it. I mean use it or don't but this is what I've discovered in my travels across this continent. We're nothing in this universe except for the energy we put out there. Most of us need to stop living in this imaginary box of what we think we're supposed to be doing because it's all just a misconception. There is no box, we're all just energy. So be the wind and find your adventure, that way you can say 'I've done it and it's great' rather than wonder about it as you skip rocks in to the ocean. The meaning of life is evident if you can see with your heart. But look at that it's almost 6:00, I gotta run, it was nice to meet you! Hopefully our paths cross again."

I was shell-shocked from our little encounter because for months now I have been looking for permission from some greater power to have a little more wreckless abandon in my life. I wasn't sure if this was my permission or not but I couldn't help but wonder. I watched her as she walked away turning into a shadow once more until the darkness swallowed her. Then she was gone. I wondered if we would cross paths again, but knowing how nomadic she was, I doubted it. I stared out into the darkness of the ocean deep in thought. It was like an empty space, an abyss with no bottom that if I fell into it I would be lost forever. How strange that being at a literal dead end in the world a new path seemed to be carving itself out for me. The sound of the waves brought me back to reality and my frozen ears began to feel a little like they would fall off any moment. So with a whistle to my dog to follow I made my way back home. That night as I got ready for bed I glanced into the mirror and in that moment instead of my reflection I saw Sal Paradise the night he met Dean.